Pillow Thugs 2020
Knife Attack on Four Plump Victims (All Pillows) Outside Darien Home
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Four plump victims, all pillows, minding their own business on chairs outside an Allen O’Neill Place home, were viciously attacked by a knife-wielding vandal sometime over the past month, according to police. The complainant told police about the incident at 7:17 p.m., Saturday. Darien police indicated that the motive for the incident remains a mystery. The complainant, a resident of the home, said it was unclear how much it would cost to either repair the soft, injured parties or replace them. When found, the victims were unresponsive, but they were unbloodied and no major organs appeared to have been damaged.